I love getting called in to work at 10:00 at night because someone can’t lock a door.

The first rule of fight club, Never talk about fight club.

The thing is people talk. Thats the way it is.

There is another quote from the movie Behind Enemy Lines. It’s when Gene Hackman’s character is leading a team in to rescue Owen Wilson’s character. He tells his men “i intend to put you in harms way.” I’ve always liked this line.

I think one thing that both of these movies allude to is what you are capable of when you are not afraid of anything. I kind of like that.

Someone asked me yesterday what I thought about Pat Robertson’s comments recently relating to the earthquake in Haiti. Now to be frank, I don’t listen to Pat Robertson. It’s not that I have a huge dislike for the man, I just have way too much going on to sit and listen to him or anyone else much for that matter. Now I’m not sure if what he said or not is true…I know I have heard this often but never really researched it. My thought on the subject is this….It doesn’t matter. Even if it happened, it does not affect my response to the situation. I would respond the same way if they had never made a pact with the devil or if they had put in express lanes to Hell. I am supposed to respond in a way that I believe Jesus would respond, and I believe that no contract that anyone makes prohibits me from loving people.
One thing is for sure, it’s good to have the facts strait. If you spend anytime in Haiti, you are sure to encounter voodoo. Whether or not they made a pact with the devil 200 years ago or not I am not sure, but I say it does no good to blame the earthquake on that. There will be earthquakes, wars, tsunamis, famine, and much more in this life, whether you are Christian or Heathen, good or bad. Only Christ will be the judge of these things.
My response, for what its worth.

Today has been an exhausting day mentally….

I was happy to hear that my friends are all safe in Haiti, but there are so many more that have been hurt or killed. My current plan is to be down there a week from Monday to survey the situation and find out what we can do to help. I haven’t felt this torn since my my break-up.

I had an interview today to get a fast pass through border patrol and customs today. I was approved which is nice, but the whole process was exhausting.

I had my first counseling appointment today. That was interesting. I’ve never been to a counselor until today, so I didn’t know what to expect. I’ll keep you updated on that. We talked a good bit about my communication issues.

On the way home I stopped by Jamie’s for a while and talked with him. It was good to see him and we had a good bit to talk about.

I’m pretty tired right now, so I think I am going to crash. Catch you on the flip.

So I know I haven’t been around in a while. It’s been kind of hard to write in recent months and even the last two years. Hopefully that will change…no this is not a New Years Resolution. Having Cellina start back up and send me a request got me thinking about pulling the site back up. If your still around, thanks for being there. If not, I’m sure I will see you around.

Here’s a recap of the last 6 months… Went to Haiti, took October off, went to Jamaica, got kidney stones, worked some, went to Haiti, back at work. I’m working on building relationships with people. I finished my A.A.. I’m working to get involved in some justice issues, like human trafficking. I’m working on cleaning some skeletons out of the closet…..

This weekend I will be at the MOVE Conference hosted by To Write Love On Her Arms . It should be good. I am going with Isaac .

I’ll try and keep you updated on life, as well as thoughts that come my way. Only if your interested.

Im heading to Deltona, then to Haiti, then to Atlanta. Should be a fun week,

I’m heading down to Rachel’s today I think. I haven’t seen Brayden since he was born, and three months is way too long.

I have two or three people that are trying to set me up with different girls. Come on people. Really?

I’ve been thinking a good bit about community and changing the way I live to be more intentional about things.  Things seems like a rather ambiguous term, but what do you expect from me. Rob says I am about as easy to nail down as Jello™.

“As long as you have a problem, putting a patch on will not fix the problem. The problem is still there. Sooner or later the patch will break and the problem will still be there. You have to fix the problem.”

I need to go to work.

It’s 3:06 and all is well. I should be asleep, but I’m not. I did talk about an hour and a half with Katie tonight which was cool. It kind of made me think of some things I miss….

• I miss being a kid, and the innocence and purity.
• I miss how much I loved Jesus back then
• I miss Africa, and the kids, and the poverty of the flesh but wealth of the soul
• I miss Atlanta, the people, and the passion
• I miss waking up early in the morning to pray
• I miss the phone calls every night last summer
• I miss the time between jobs were I was relaxed
• I miss being sure about things
• I miss the prostitutes at church and Churches Chicken, the drug addicts and alcoholics in Gainesville, and Peaches (where ever he may be and whatever he may be singing)
• I miss Deep End
• I miss watching the sun rise, and watching it set
• I miss wine and cigarettes on back porches
• I miss my close friends, my family
• I miss George, Chrissy, Dana, Emily, Billy and the rest who are with Jesus
• I miss drinking coffee, but not as much as I thought I would
• I miss the desire to write

I am learning to love my neighbor and to live by the golden rule
But it’s so hard when I’ve been lied to
I feel like a fool forgiving a fool

It ain’t easy learning to love like you

I am learning to be faithful with the little that I have
To do like Jesus and turn the tables
To give it all to get nothing back

It ain’t easy leaning to love like you

By P. O´Hara

I’m back from Kenya. Good trip. Tough in a lot of ways. I havn’t been feeling well any this week. A lot is weighing on the mind and soul. Finals are finished. Rejection is never fun. I have some good friends. I wish I was in Africa. I am happy to be home. There is a lot to do at work. I am planning the summer. Some rough days ahead I am sure. Can’t wait to go to the beach.